things i know about game of thrones

Here are things I know about Game of Thrones from being on the Internet, reading over Pete’s shoulder and playing the Game of Thrones pinball machine at the Rock Shop:

There is a queen with double processed hair, although it’s doubtful they have bleach in this strange land

The dragons are extinct I think?

Everyone has sex with each other, even brothers and sisters

The Tangerines! Those are the incestuous ones, right?

There is a guy called Grey Worm and he doesn’t have a worm anymore!

Someone picked off his scabs! Gross! But satisfying!

Everyone gets killed in the Red Wedding, but there are somehow still characters left

Jon Snow came back to life and there is only one available press shot of him where he’s trudging through snow

There is a tremendous amount of boobs

“Winter is coming!!!” (in pinball that means you get an extra ball)

Ed Sheeran was in it!

So was Lily Allen’s brother

The families — Martell, Barthanon and Tangerine — are always fighting and there is an evil guy with blond hair that sentences everyone to gruesome deaths

The poor people choose from apples or onions

It is like the Middle Ages and everyone is British

That’s all I know!

Published by Emilee Lindner

I’m a writer, cat fancier and lover of all things autumn.

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